The recent dearth of posts in my blog might lead you, faithful readers, to think that I am having a dry spell. Nothing could be farther from the truth. In fact, these past few weeks have so far been my most creative since the year started. I’m actually shitting thunderbolts of ideas from my puckered little asshole on a daily basis and perfectly sane people strangely deem it worth a tidy sum of money. Not a whole lot at this point, of course (the big bucks will come from writing actual scripts), but enough to be disgusting for people who value real manly work. Like hauling rocks and shit. While I respect manly work, let me just say that I am of a wholly different persuasion. I want to be paid for not using my God-given muscles. I want to be paid for brainfarting words and ideas.
What I’ve been doing for the past few weeks that has been keeping me away from posting nasty, retarded articles on the internet is called TV show development. It involves hanging out with other creative minds for days on end, high octane brainstorming, lots of screaming at each other, and horribly unhealthy meals. The main objective in our particular case is to force a handful of television shows out of our collective brain vaginas. I can’t tell you what we’re coming up with for obvious reasons but I must say the process of creation is exhilarating.
I’m not saying what we’re doing is art. This is television, for fuck’s sake, not an indie film. It’s cheap mainstream entertainment for the masses who, by the way, isn’t really known for its cultured taste. Besides, any dumb fuck with a video camera can make an indie movie. Just like any dumb fuck who’s too lazy to revise a script can be an indie writer. But, as hotshot ABS-CBN Program Manager Raymund Dizon will tell you, we’re not doing crap either. Cheesy? More often than not. Philippine TV shows-- at least ABS-CBN shows-- are as cheesy as is necessary for them to be gobbled up by the masses. Lots of brain cells get vaporized to get the right amount of cheese in a show.
The point is that developing TV shows requires clarity of thought, precision of vision, seriousness of purpose, professional work ethics, and-- above all-- an imaginative mind unencumbered by the ravages of substance abuse. And because I know you won’t believe me until you see such a marvel for yourself, I have taken the time to provide you with photographic evidence thereof: